Elle M NOPe

A week ago, I attended a ceremony to honour the full moon eclipse in Taurus, with a focus on breathwork, reiki, and soundbath healing at center called Zenden. It was an extraordinarily powerful experience for me. Before this, I had not had the opportunity to do breathwork. And I don’t think I was quite prepared for how difficult active breathing can be.

I am not sure if what happened was some hallucination, or some kind of dark magic possession. But while I struggled with the breathing for about 4 minutes, when I released the energy built from it through yelling – the sounds I made were masculine and almost demonic sounding. There was nothing that I was able to recognize as my own voice. When we returned to the active breath, it suddenly became much easier – because I was approached by a water dragon, and I allowed it to breathe for me. My breathing became loud and even and focused. It made me feel like I was powerful – that I was the one leading the class (of which I was not). That dragon showed me images of the children that I was supposed to have had (but didn’t) with my partner. It showed us as a family, standing on a beach staring out at the water, where we saw the ocean being set on fire.

I came away from this experience feeling powerful. Feeling wonderful. The best I had felt in a long time. But the longer that I sat with this energy, the more uneasy I began to feel. I am a person who seventh guesses almost everything in my life. With this dragon energy, there was no second guessing – I just fully committed to it when it appeared. This makes it unusual. When I told a trusted spiritual advisor about what happened -she asked me to start being more discerning about the third eye energies that I come into contact with. I let her know that I believed this to be a benevolent spirit, otherwise it wouldn’t have felt so good. But after lengthy conversations, I have discovered that this spirit is dark. And is taking me away from my goals and purpose in this lifetime.

I am still not completely certain what this spirit was trying to do. But I am feeling like its trying to prevent me from talking with others. And its gaslighting me to believe that I am all powerful, instead of working on healing what needs to be healed. It’s a distraction to keep me from what I deserve. It’s also trying to convince me that I am crazy – and while this post may make me seem otherwise, I am definitely sane.

This post uses all 26 letters of the alphabet.
*Photo Source- Pinterest via Paul Cude